Oprah Winfrey: When you were 5, your family moved to the Marcy projects -- and then your father left when you were 11. When you look back at that, what did your 11-year-old self feel?
Jay-Z: Anger. At the whole situation. Because when you're growing up, your dad is your superhero. Once you've let yourself fall that in love with someone, once you put him on such a high pedestal and he lets you down, you never want to experience that pain again. So I remember just being really quiet and really cold. Never wanting to let myself get close to someone like that again. I carried that feeling throughout my life, until my father and I met up before he died.
By Oprah Winfrey from O, The Oprah Magazine, September 2009 © 2009 Harpo Productions, Inc.
My father recently disappeared (for good it seems). I have recently began efforts to find him again so I can move on emotionally in my life as well. This WAS an excerpt from a poem I wrote about him during my 3rd semseter at Florida State University. (go NOLES!)...but I have since decided to share in hopes a certain black girl that rocks will consider reading it...*exhales*
by LaQueena Anderson
You told me you loved me,
The day those tadpoles entered her womb.
You said you'd take care of me,
You'd love and protect me, like a dead lover in a tomb.
You told me you'd cherish me always.
You promised me in an internal marriage.
Your eyes said you would, the day you looked into my carriage.
I hate the way you love me.
You have loved me like no other.
Bonding with your addiction to a selfish, hellish lover.
She or they never loved you like me.
I looked into the stars every night,
Hoping you'd become addicted to me.
They only wanted your money and every ounce of your soul.
They strive to keep you helpless, bitter, and weak.
No heart's intimate passion, did they seek.
I needed your presence and attention to make me whole.
I needed to learn you, body and soul.
Why couldn't that just be mine?
I am you...we would have been just fine.
What happened to that bond we shared?
Did it disappear enough to make you act like you never cared?
Did it flee your heart the way you ran away from me?
Was I always just a financial responsibility?
Was I a bother to your plans?
Was the world's love so good to you,
You couldn't even pretend to be a man?
A simple explanation would have been fine.
A little respect, interaction...just a little piece of your time.
Did I need to tell you I was sorry?
Did I need to apologize for being born?
You couldn't stay shortly after my appearance.
Did your flesh leave you feeling torn?
Why was that life so important to you?
Why was I not worthy of the truth?
Death becomes those that don't respect the womb.
I Will Not Lose E-Book Review:
Get I Will Not Lose E-Book!
Comments